A Nugget of Knowledge

Writing Writing

I recently signed up for MasterClass, as there were more than just a few people giving courses that I'd love to hear from. I started with Steve Martin's course on comedy. I don't think I learned anything specific that I'd call out, but I did get a solid overview of his thought process and I found it very enlightening. I then took Shonda Rhimes Teaches Writing for Television, and found it even more useful, as I'm working on a television screenplay (don't worry, it's for fun. It's going to suck. But I want to do it).
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You're Already Connected

Bit.Parts I, Developer Bit.Parts I, Developer

When I was in high school, in the 80s, I was part of a group that hacked into corporate voicemail systems so that we young hackers could communicate. Voicemail was pretty obscure then. You could find me, around lunchtime, at the payphone on campus, picking up and leaving messages. (Note for the young, look up "payphone" if you need to).
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Match.com's Fake Problem

ChrisSplaining Popular ChrisSplaining Popular

UPDATE, 26 September, 2019 - The FTC is suing Match.com for just the situation I describe in this blog post! 

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/09/25/us/match-com-lawsuit-ftc.html

Match.com has a fake problem. That is, they have a problem with fake accounts and there is a clear reason why they have, for years, refused to do a single thing about it.
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The Ultimate Counter to the Exposure Pitch

Best Practices Popular Best Practices Popular

There are a decent number of stories going around the Internet about how artists should push back on being asked to work for free. Let me state up front that I agree with this position to the tune of about 80%.
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He Knows, You Know...

Best Practices Popular Best Practices Popular

Donald Rumsfeld was the United States Secretary of Defense from 2001 to 2006 under President Bush. He is known for many things, but will always be remembered for his statement of an old truism, as quoted -
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A Nugget of Knowledge
You're Already Connected
Match.com's Fake Problem
The Ultimate Counter to the Exposure Pitch
He Knows, You Know...

On Writing

NerdSmart is fully dusted off. The old placeholder content is still there, though, so now's the time to clear it out and put in real content.

Some might like this phase of web development most. I don't. I prefer to do the infrastructure work and let more creative people do the content part.

But I've tried paying people to write. Those who are inexpensive produce utter garbage. Those who command a reasonable rate flake. This isn't a generalization, it's a truism. I've had a few exceptions to this rule, and they know who they are. Otherwise, I have to say F-you, Jobu, I do it myself.

I had a huge piece of salmon for dinner. If I exit this food coma before bed time, I'll start. 

Tags:
writing web development motivation

Political Thought for the Day

If you want religion in schools, be prepared for all religions to have their time on stage, including the case for no religion.

If you want social media to be liable for what people say, be prepared for them to decline such liability and refuse your account.

If you want the freedom to deny a gay couple a wedding cake, be prepared to be turned away if you're not wearing a mask.

Hypocrisy is never pretty.

Unintended Stress Testing

One thing to come of this pandemic is the unintended stress and integration tests being put to our systems, especially home automation. In my house, we have, by being home 24/7 for the past two weeks, put enough unexpected stress on our house that some very interesting failure modes are starting to make themselves known

It started when a couple of my smoke detectors started giving false alarms. This wasn't a case of low or dead batteries, and it tended to happen early in the morning. Some research indicated that the particular model I have tends to give false alarms when dirty. Sure enough, taking them down, the amount of dust was higher than usual. My only hypothesis is that everyone being home 24/7 and the house being mostly closed because of cool weather means more humidity. That could mean dust is "sticking" to things. So, time to clean all the detectors.

And our smart thermostats are completely confused. The concept of "home" and "away" is nonsensical to it now, and its learning logic doesn't appear to know how to cope. I've turned them to full manual and nailed them to the temperature we want. I'll reprogram them later and turn off learning entirely. There is no "house arrest" mode. There should be!

One stress test that we've all been part of has been the Internet and cell system - and it's notable that it's held up pretty well for the most part. Usage patters have changed considerably, but we're all still online. We're all trying to work from home and binge watch movies. Bandwidth usage has spiked - but nothing's fallen down. This is good news.

My New Book!

Fansplaining for Dummies - available wherever fine pedantism is sold. 

A Better Way To Fool (this year)

For April Fool this year, I was going to spin a tale of how I'd accepted a request to stand for election for Congress in 2022 and would be beginning my campaign immediately after this year's election. I think it would have been totally believable and fooled many of you.

Due to the current world situation, I clue you into my planned prank and then ensure you know that it would have been a prank and hope that you get a grin imagining how it might have played out.

April Fool is out of bounds this year - but humor still helps.

Unless you think it would have been a crappy Fool, in which case I still love you, but you're wrong ;)

(I encourage everyone to post what they would have done, in the bounds of good taste, but not actually pull the prank itself)

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  • SELECT DISTINCT a.id, a.title, a.name, a.checked_out, a.checked_out_time, a.note, a.state, a.access, a.created_time, a.created_user_id, a.ordering, a.language, a.fieldparams, a.params, a.type, a.default_value, a.context, a.group_id, a.label, a.description, a.required, a.only_use_in_subform,l.title AS language_title, l.image AS language_image,uc.name AS editor,ag.title AS access_level,ua.name AS author_name,g.title AS group_title, g.access as group_access, g.state AS group_state, g.note as group_note FROM bit_fields AS a LEFT JOIN `bit_languages` AS l ON l.lang_code = a.language LEFT JOIN bit_users AS uc ON uc.id=a.checked_out LEFT JOIN bit_viewlevels AS ag ON ag.id = a.access LEFT JOIN bit_users AS ua ON ua.id = a.created_user_id LEFT JOIN bit_fields_groups AS g ON g.id = a.group_id LEFT JOIN `bit_fields_categories` AS fc ON fc.field_id = a.id WHERE ( (`a`.`context` = :context AND (`fc`.`category_id` IS NULL OR `fc`.`category_id` IN (:preparedArray1,:preparedArray2)) AND `a`.`access` IN (:preparedArray3,:preparedArray4)) AND (`a`.`group_id` = 0 OR `g`.`access` IN (:preparedArray5,:preparedArray6)) AND `a`.`state` = :state) AND (`a`.`group_id` = 0 OR `g`.`state` = :gstate) AND `a`.`only_use_in_subform` = :only_use_in_subform ORDER BY a.ordering ASC1.4ms4.75KBParams/libraries/src/MVC/Model/BaseDatabaseModel.php:164Copy
  • SELECT DISTINCT a.id, a.title, a.name, a.checked_out, a.checked_out_time, a.note, a.state, a.access, a.created_time, a.created_user_id, a.ordering, a.language, a.fieldparams, a.params, a.type, a.default_value, a.context, a.group_id, a.label, a.description, a.required, a.only_use_in_subform,l.title AS language_title, l.image AS language_image,uc.name AS editor,ag.title AS access_level,ua.name AS author_name,g.title AS group_title, g.access as group_access, g.state AS group_state, g.note as group_note FROM bit_fields AS a LEFT JOIN `bit_languages` AS l ON l.lang_code = a.language LEFT JOIN bit_users AS uc ON uc.id=a.checked_out LEFT JOIN bit_viewlevels AS ag ON ag.id = a.access LEFT JOIN bit_users AS ua ON ua.id = a.created_user_id LEFT JOIN bit_fields_groups AS g ON g.id = a.group_id LEFT JOIN `bit_fields_categories` AS fc ON fc.field_id = a.id WHERE ( (`a`.`context` = :context AND (`fc`.`category_id` IS NULL OR `fc`.`category_id` IN (:preparedArray1,:preparedArray2)) AND `a`.`access` IN (:preparedArray3,:preparedArray4)) AND (`a`.`group_id` = 0 OR `g`.`access` IN (:preparedArray5,:preparedArray6)) AND `a`.`state` = :state) AND (`a`.`group_id` = 0 OR `g`.`state` = :gstate) AND `a`.`only_use_in_subform` = :only_use_in_subform ORDER BY a.ordering ASC1.27ms4.75KBParams/libraries/src/MVC/Model/BaseDatabaseModel.php:164Copy
  • SELECT DISTINCT a.id, a.title, a.name, a.checked_out, a.checked_out_time, a.note, a.state, a.access, a.created_time, a.created_user_id, a.ordering, a.language, a.fieldparams, a.params, a.type, a.default_value, a.context, a.group_id, a.label, a.description, a.required, a.only_use_in_subform,l.title AS language_title, l.image AS language_image,uc.name AS editor,ag.title AS access_level,ua.name AS author_name,g.title AS group_title, g.access as group_access, g.state AS group_state, g.note as group_note FROM bit_fields AS a LEFT JOIN `bit_languages` AS l ON l.lang_code = a.language LEFT JOIN bit_users AS uc ON uc.id=a.checked_out LEFT JOIN bit_viewlevels AS ag ON ag.id = a.access LEFT JOIN bit_users AS ua ON ua.id = a.created_user_id LEFT JOIN bit_fields_groups AS g ON g.id = a.group_id LEFT JOIN `bit_fields_categories` AS fc ON fc.field_id = a.id WHERE ( (`a`.`context` = :context AND (`fc`.`category_id` IS NULL OR `fc`.`category_id` IN (:preparedArray1,:preparedArray2)) AND `a`.`access` IN (:preparedArray3,:preparedArray4)) AND (`a`.`group_id` = 0 OR `g`.`access` IN (:preparedArray5,:preparedArray6)) AND `a`.`state` = :state) AND (`a`.`group_id` = 0 OR `g`.`state` = :gstate) AND `a`.`only_use_in_subform` = :only_use_in_subform ORDER BY a.ordering ASC1.19ms4.75KBParams/libraries/src/MVC/Model/BaseDatabaseModel.php:164Copy
  • SELECT act.* FROM bit_jfbconnect_autopost_activity act WHERE `act`.`ext`='com_easyblog' AND `act`.`layout`='latest' AND `act`.`item_id`='' AND `act`.`type`=1 AND `act`.`status`=21.02ms1.45KB/plugins/system/jfbcsystem/jfbcsystem.php:333Copy
  • SELECT `a`.`menutype`,`a`.`title` FROM `bit_menu_types` AS `a` WHERE `a`.`client_id` = 0999μs608B/libraries/gantry5/src/classes/Gantry/Framework/Menu.php:138Copy
  • SELECT m.id, m.alias, m.path AS route, m.level, m.parent_id FROM bit_menu AS m WHERE m.menutype = 'mainmenu' AND m.parent_id > 0 AND m.client_id = 0 AND m.published >= 0 ORDER BY m.lft996μs912B/libraries/gantry5/src/classes/Gantry/Framework/Menu.php:791Copy
  • SELECT * FROM `bit_easyblog_category` WHERE `id` = '4'1.04ms2.72KB/libraries/src/Table/Table.php:780Copy
  • SELECT * FROM `bit_easyblog_category` WHERE `id` = '5'1.02ms2.72KB/libraries/src/Table/Table.php:780Copy
  • SELECT * FROM `bit_easyblog_category` WHERE `id` = '6'1.02ms2.72KB/libraries/src/Table/Table.php:780Copy
  • SELECT * FROM `bit_easyblog_category` WHERE `id` = '9'1.02ms2.72KB/libraries/src/Table/Table.php:780Copy
  • SELECT * FROM `bit_easyblog_category` WHERE `id` = '13'1.01ms2.72KB/libraries/src/Table/Table.php:780Copy
  • SELECT * FROM `bit_easyblog_category` WHERE `id` = '11'1.03ms2.72KB/libraries/src/Table/Table.php:780Copy
  • SELECT * FROM `bit_extensions` WHERE `element` = 'com_gsd' AND `type` = 'component'1.12ms2.53KB/plugins/system/nrframework/NRFramework/Extension.php:160Copy
  • SHOW FULL COLUMNS FROM `bit_gsd_config`1.47ms1.3KB/libraries/vendor/joomla/database/src/Mysqli/MysqliDriver.php:587Copy
  • SELECT * FROM `bit_gsd_config` WHERE `name` = 'config'879μs592B/libraries/src/Table/Table.php:780Copy
  • SELECT a.* FROM bit_gsd a WHERE a.state = 1 AND a.plugin = 'menus' AND a.appview IN ('menus','*') ORDER BY a.id desc1.04ms1.44KB/libraries/src/MVC/Model/BaseDatabaseModel.php:164Copy
  • SELECT SUM(CASE WHEN `a`.`next_execution` <= :now THEN 1 ELSE 0 END) AS due_count,SUM(CASE WHEN `a`.`locked` IS NULL THEN 0 ELSE 1 END) AS locked_count FROM `bit_scheduler_tasks` AS `a` WHERE `a`.`state` = 11.21ms1.37KBParams/administrator/components/com_scheduler/src/Model/TasksModel.php:465Copy
  • SELECT `session_id` FROM `bit_session` WHERE `session_id` = ?856μs12KBParams/libraries/vendor/joomla/session/src/Handler/DatabaseHandler.php:277Copy
  • UPDATE `bit_session` SET `data` = ? , `time` = ? WHERE `session_id` = ?5.31ms592BParams/libraries/vendor/joomla/session/src/Handler/DatabaseHandler.php:301Copy